When you think about twins, one of the first images that comes to mind is probably a pair of people in matching outfits.
And a lot of people who have twins—or are twins—(myself included, on both counts) have probably sported identical or coordinating get-ups.
Sometimes, it's fun—and cute—to see two little humans wearing the exact same thing.
But, I think there can also be TOO much of the same, same, same.
Don't get me wrong. I'm all for celebrating the incredibly special experience and unique bond that comes with being a twin. Because there's nothing like it.
I am a twin. I am a mother of twins. I'm an auntie of twins. Twins are not foreign to me…and I think, maybe, that's why I'm aware that sometimes Twinning It isn't always Winning It.
Some people seem to be utterly mesmerized when they encounter twins "out in the wild," and it's all they seem to be able to focus on.
How much they look alike, how much they can't tell them apart (even though, sometimes, there are giveaways, like one being a girl and one being a boy, one having a different eye color, or one having a birthmark when their counterpart doesn't).
For some reason, when you put two people in matching shirts (or car seat covers), suddenly, all bets are off, and all they want to know is how you tell them apart.
It's a fair question. But the answer is easy.
Even if a set of twins looks strikingly similar, they each are their own person with their own personality.
Even if a set of twins looks strikingly similar, they each are their own person with their own personality.
I get the excitement around twins. I understand it, and I wish more people knew what it was like to have a twin because it really is something incredible.
But at the same time, part of me wonders if it's possible to lean a little too hard into the twin side of things.
After all, it's not the only part of their identity.
I'm not saying don't be proud to be a twin or to have twins. Absolutely be proud!
Like those who head down to the Twins Days Festival every year. This year's event marks the 50th anniversary of the world's largest gathering of twins and multiples, which takes place in Twinsburg, Ohio every August.
While I think it would be fun to attend the festival when my twins are a bit older, I want to make sure they grow up to strike a balance between the pride they show for their twin side and the pride they show for their individual side.
Whether you're a twin yourself or a parent of a twin, celebrate all of the special things that come with being twins...just don't forget to celebrate their individuality, too.
I'm reminded of this every summer, as a new school year rolls around.
We'd go and meet our teacher(s) for the upcoming year and one of the first things I'd hear my mom say was, "They're twins."
And I'd internally roll my eyes (at least, I hope it was internally). Because it wasn't the only thing I thought was important to know about me, but it was usually the first thing to come up.
Now, as a mother to my own set of twins, I can appreciate why my mom always brought that fact to my teachers' attention.
It wasn't about singling me out as a twin; it was about making sure educators watched for our individual differences, even if we might have looked or sounded the same. It was about making sure our separate needs were met and that our individuality wasn't forgotten.
Because twins, whether they're fraternal or identical, are still different people.
This is why part of me laughs when people say you MUST keep your newborn twins on the exact same schedule. Because, yes, it DOES make life as a parent of multiples easier, but it's also not always feasible because they're different people and have different wants and needs at different times.
One twin might not be ready for bed at the exact same second as their counterpart. Are YOU always hungry or ready for bed at the exact same time as your partner? Probably not. So, while it'd be ideal to keep everyone on the same schedule, that's not always realistic.
But this isn't an article about feeding nor putting your twins to bed.
It's about celebrating individuality and making sure you don't forget that your twins are their own people who will grow up to have different interests and different strengths.
One might do really well with math and science; the other might excel in language arts.
One might love playing baseball; the other might live and breathe soccer.
One might come alive while sourcing ingredients and making food; the other might have no interest in the prep but does love sampling it.
While it's easy to lean into the twin angle, I've realized from my own combined experience of being a twin and now a mother of twins, that it's also incredibly important to celebrate their differences.
Make sure your twins have the chance to experience the same things, but also be cognizant of letting their individual interests lead the way as they flourish and grow.
Do you do anything in particular to celebrate your twins' individuality? Let us know in the Comments section below or connect with us on Instagram to share your thoughts!
Read more
From Twin to Twin Mom: Consider Yourself Twice as Lucky to be a Twin Mom
Some people ask themselves what on Earth they did to deserve twins. I ask myself how I got so lucky. Maybe it's because I'm also a twin myself and I'm biased in this department. But having twins and getting to watch them grown and figure out this world together is like nothing else. That's not to say that having twins is a breeze because, sometimes, it's more like standing still...
A-Hunting We Will Go: 3 Ways to Make Easter Memorable with Your Twins
Leading up to Easter, there are always three big questions on my mind. One: Will the Easter Bunny bring me anything? Spoiler alert, the Bunny never disappoints. Two: Will the hunt be inside or outside? That one's a little less definite and can be a bit of a toss-up, depending on how early Easter falls. Growing up, my favorite Easter egg hunts were always the ones we did outdoors....
These Tools Can Help You Create the Best Jack-o’-Lanterns on the Block
Halloween is just around the corner! It's time to get creative. Carving the jack-o'-lantern is one of my favorite Halloween traditions. Sitting down with my family and collaborating on an idea for that year's pumpkin and then helping scoop out the "pumpkin guts" and watching as the jack-o'-lantern came to life with each carving pass my dad made was one of my highlights every Halloween...
How to Prevent Noticeable Stretch Marks When You're Pregnant with Multiples
If you've been pregnant, currently are pregnant, or know someone who's been pregnant, you've likely heard about, or experienced, the stretch mark scarring that can develop as a result of a rapidly growing belly. This is because anywhere from 50 to 90 percent of people who are pregnant will develop stretch marks. But did you also know that stretch marks can appear due to rapid weight...